Effervescent Thoughts

Part One:

Do you hope and aspire to dream the dreams of things your past could not provide you with..take the time to meditate on the things that take precedence in your life. Are you motivated? Are you captivated? Are you inspired? What do these words mean to you if anything..or are you just a feeble mind who lacks such an inquisitive nature..would you dare be so meek to live among the unquestionable minds..just some food for thought..



Part Two:

I will spill these words upon the canvas as they have wrought and fought against my brainstem screaming for a way out.

Our spirits broken, our hearts rused and jaded. How can we truly begin again? O to be but a child with fresh eyes, fresh spirit, untainted soul, and unbroken heart.

Are we but indentured servants to these life experiences?

Is it unquestionable, unthinkable..to try to wish? To conjure up a way to be freed of our duly oppressed selves..only to be critiqued by oneself?! Over and over in madness and in torture..

Does history repeat itself? Do sinners who repent learn not but what they do but rather what they mean?! Who they curse?

Who's blessed good heart they run riot upon and wild like savageous weeds among the garden. The worm and infestation in the apple. The cancer in thy body? Is it you?! Are we all forsaken here? Are we but the same people living the same lives only to be doomed like a tragic hero by ourselves. The tears that have once shed that damned precursor for the future has gathered with every wave and every roll in the ocean. With every emotion felt within the tide itself. Gravity to blame? How would one escape gravity exactly?



This was in the works last night, part one's inspiration came to me while I was driving (the worst of times o_O) and I managed to get everything down on inkpad notepad via mostly speech to text. B hit me up yet again last few days, talking about how he hates sleeping alone. I keep our conversations bare minimum or at least try to. He gets dissatisfied and stops so I win. Yesterday he said something about being a liar and I went off on him basically and told him if he wants to talk shit to me why does he even bother texting me. His phone is off so he uses some app and is always texting me from new/different phone numbers. At the time I was thinking "you love to bother me because I'm all you fuckin have" it's really dumb..he really has no one else in the world left to bother I think. Most of the time he leaves me alone so that's good.

on a more strange note..dynasty hit me up on fb completely out of the blue..he and I don't speak unless it's about the car which I almost have paid off..less and a grand left so thank GOD. He sent a message and all it said was "weird ass" I asked him what and he said what nothing. So I said why did you say that he said no reason so I said you're the weird ass then..he said "just wanted to talk" which is strange..he doesn't ever just want to talk. Strange..just strange. Oh well.