what the hell

these words shall cease to rest these lips
a fighting chance they do not stand
whats done in kind
 is done in kind
even if you are not my kind
with poise I rest
your feelings to test
destroy the path of the conquered
in your face I see dishonor
while your guilt lies shameless...

so homeboy fuck your feelings
i refuse to be the subject
i refuse to to be the predicate
fuck your predatory ways
yep I said it
fuck that nonsense
fuck it sideways
and fuck it backwards
all these things are lessons learned

Aeschylus Quote

"Even in our sleep, pain which cannot forget 

falls drop by drop upon the heart, 

until, in our own despair, 

against our will, 

comes wisdom 

through the awful grace of God."-Aeschylus

Sometimes I lay and wonder

wide awake in the darkness

where are you tonight

restless in my mind

shuffling though the memories

praying that you would save me

but every night the same thing

I've run out of stars to wish on

hoping one of them would grant me this wish

In the darkness I can't see the light of the moon

so empty in this solitude

I find myself running from it all

just to end up back here in my head 

and alone

I'll push the world away just to keep you close in my heart

The fog on the glass

The raindrops that are left

the loneliness

the sadness

the pain

where are you

can't you feel that I need you

can't you feel, that I need YOU

despite it all it was always you

but it's not enough

my love is not enough

I did this one for fun with a writing prompt, the prompt was the quote..to read to quote and just write from there.

Truth

I am ever so grateful to be able to establish this little bit of honesty between us. And after everything my instincts were correct as I have NEVER doubted them but rather gave you the benefit of the doubt.

I am sorry for the way you went about the situation at that point in time and for my actions in return. In all honestly I did care at one point. I did show you with everything that was within me.

And now a sense of relief although I'll never be able to look at you the way I once did.

Disappointed in you, yes.

TBC...

Slumber

Words do seem to populate my mind yet things so thought provoking and so dynamic leave me at a loss. I can feel a heaviness weighing upon thy brow beckoning slumber...Oh evermore. Sleep, the longing for such is dreamlike. The way ones lashes flutter with every long blink fighting to stay awake. Give me reason to stay in reality and not to sleep. A reason worth being awake for. There is none.

Liquor

The feeling isn't everything. Its not what I want to feel. Impressionable, the music is really getting to me. I'm tired of everyone and everything. I want to be alone yet not in my thoughts. I wanna leave it all behind me. In the pillows, in the sheets but never take it with me. The things I harbor manifesting within myself. Them things that creep along your spine. Sends chills down ones back in time. In time none of these things mean anything. It's the liquor running through me.

Betrayal- assignment 6

For this assignment we had to let the title give meaning to/set the tone of the poem.  Most of the class didn't really understand mine. Key words/Phrases were: drift away, your hand grows limp in mine (meaning letting me go), fleeing, fleeting, fade


Betrayal
Laying in the crisp green grass
Watching fireflies drift away
to a place I do not know.
As your hand grows limp in mine while you fall asleep.
The dark sapphire sky has seldom wispy dark grey clouds.
I can see stars forming constellations stretching far and wide.
The names of which escape my mind.
In the distance a stray shooting star seems to be fleeing.
Fleeting into the abysmal sky.
An hour, or two, or three goes by before
The sky, stars, and moon all begin to fade.

The Things You've Missed

You missed my first day of elementary school, middle school, high school, and college.
You missed my 8th grade talent show.
Michael Jackson's "Wanna Be Starting Somethin,"
I choreographed the whole thing myself.
You missed every play and musical I was in.
You missed every field hockey game and track meet I had.
You never saw the article in the paper about the time I made the save that qualified our team for the state champion chip.
You missed my graduations.
You missed every medal, trophy, and award I've ever gotten
and every single time I have ever felt proud.
You missed it when I got dehydrated at field hockey camp and needed to be picked up.
You missed every birthday after the age of three.
You never danced a father daughter dance with me.
You never took me to work with you on take your child to work day.
You never spent a Father's day with me.
You never taught me how to ride a bike.
You never read me bedtime stories about princesses in far away lands or tucked me into a pink flowery bed.
You missed my first time on the road.
You missed my first car accident.
You missed the time I fell down the stairs and really messed up my foot.
You missed my first day working and how giddy I was to be making my own money.
even if it was at Chuck E. Cheese
You missed it when I felt my first heartache.
You never told me the type of men to watch out for.
You never told me that falling in love would hurt.
You weren't there when I sat looking out the window and at every car that passed by I said, "Daddy?"
I can see you now, nursing a bottle of liquor and some crack cocaine when you could have been nursing me.
You were never my hero.
Now, when you call I don't pick up and I don't return your calls.
I don't want to talk to you.
We have nothing to talk about.
I simply don't care at all.